As I was sending out my Winter Solstice cards and updating contacts, I discovered one of my long time online friends had passed away last month. I did a search and found her obit. She had been ill for a long time and it had been a few months since I spoke with her or heard from her. And just now as I was sorting through old data CDs, I found her website backup.

I never met her but we became those internet kind of friends you see everyday and IM.  She helped me learn about what it was to live with disabling health stuff, and remain kind, gentle and patient after my second spinal surgery by talking me through anxiety and panic attacks and keeping me busy with web stuff. When her husband died we spent hours online together so she didn’t feel so alone. I’ll miss her light in the world.

Now that I am busier and a life of constant doctor visits has morphed into an art & writing career, peppered with a job and some volunteer work all balanced with a spinal cord injury and the needs of my own family, I don’t talk with those women with whom I forged online friendships with as often. I don’t  update here as often as I might for the same reasons.  Sometimes months go by.  Sometimes, I remind myself to drop an e-mail and then something happens to distract me. I keep up by reading their blogs when I have the time to check in but I wonder if it’s enough. Of course, they have the same issues- family, grandbabies, health concerns that zap time and energy and so I don’t hear from them as much either. Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be…